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The Golden Flix Awards 2008

Dec 19 2008 Posted by in entertainment | 6 comments

[EDITED 12/31/08 to include several worthy new films that forced retractions.]

Toss your dog in your purse and text your publicist on the way to the dress fitting . . . it’s time to raise the sails for my third annual windbaggery about the year in cinema – at least the approximately 120 new films that I saw – hyperbolic, symbolic, and gastronomic. I’ve spread the acclaim out over as many worthy films as possible.

Exceptions aside, 2008 was dominated by mediocre offerings, notably lacking in strong female roles. Fair warning as usual: I haven’t yet seen some of the late-year entries that often dominate awards season, including: Rachel Getting Married, The Wrestler, and Doubt.

And now, live except on the west coast, this year’s winners and runners up. . .

FUNNIEST DUDE
Danny McBride, The Foot Fist Way
Robert Downey, Jr., Tropic Thunder

FUNNIEST FEMME
Elizabeth Banks, Zak and Miri Make a Porno
Catherine Keener, Hamlet 2

FILM THAT MADE ME SNARF SODA OUT MY NOSE
Hamlet 2
Sex and Death 101

FILM NOT TO WATCH IN THE DARK
[REC]
The Orphanage

FILM THAT OPENED MY MIND
Towelhead
Man on Wire

DRAMA KING
Jamie Bell, Mister Foe
Clint Eastwood, Gran Torino

DRAMA QUEEN
Catinca Untaru, The Fall
Laura Linney, The Savages

BADDEST-ASS BADASS
Heath Ledger, The Dark Knight
Ralph Fiennes, In Bruges

SURPRISE PERFORMANCE
Stephen Dorff, Felon
Ryan Reynolds, Definitely, Maybe

SEXIEST STARLET
Marisa Tomei, Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead
Jess Weixler, Teeth

ADRENALINE WITHOUT CHEESE
The Dark Knight
Quantum of Solace

MOST EFFED-UP TWIST
Synecdoche, New York
Stuck

SNAPPIEST DIALOGUE
Gran Torino
Choke

BEST ENSEMBLE CAST
Tropic Thunder
Be Kind Rewind

BEST MUSIC
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Slumdog Millionaire

COOLEST VISUAL STYLE
The Fall
Slumdog Millionaire

WANTED TO HATE, BUT DIDN’T
Smart People
[REC]

UNDER-THE-RADAR SURPRISE
Let the Right One In
In Bruges

BEST TV SHOW ON DISC
Battlestar Galactica
Spaced

ILLEST DISC EXTRAS
Blade Runner: Final Cut
WALL•E

BEST IMPORT
Let the Right One In
The Orphanage

WORTHY FILMS THAT DON’T FIT ELSEWHERE
Iron Man
Starting Out in the Evening

WORST WAY TO SPEND $9.25
Revolver
Speed Racer

BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENT
Burn After Reading
The X-Files: I Want to Believe

BEST FUCKIN’ FILM
WALL•E
The Dark Knight

  1. stephengrahamjones12-24-08

    supercool categories. especially “MOST EFFED-UP TWIST.”

    and yeah, I should have given WALL*E some ranking myself, I suspect.

  2. chrisp12-30-08

    One, you must see The Wrestler. Rorke pwns Oscar. Two, Dark Knight tops Walle, even if I got a little misty. And three, hells yes Marisa! I’d a hooked up a threeway, don’t care if Phillip was my brother. Talk about being in heaven for ten minutes… 😀

  3. G12-31-08

    I saw several worthy films this week since that posting, and will be printing some retractions soon.

  4. sardonic-artery12-31-08

    Thanks for the list, Gordon. I’m curious, in this world where words can mean just about anything, is “MOST EFFED-UP TWIST” good or bad?

  5. G12-31-08

    I mean “Most Effed-Up Twist” in a positive way, that flips storytelling on its head, and it doesn’t necessarily have to be something the audience doesn’t see coming. Both of those films’ so-called twists were detailed in their synopses, yet they still managed to twist our expectations even further upon viewing. Maybe the category should be something about original concepts instead. Looking back to previous years, I gave this category to Save the Green Planet, Bug, Hard Candy, and Lucky Number Slevin. So it’s probably somewhere in between. But all good.

  6. G01-12-09

    And a couple more revisions, as I had to give Hamlet 2 some deserved comic love.